Why New Year’s Resolutions Don’t Last - Setting Goals for Lasting Change

So what was your New Year’s resolution this year? Was it to lose weight, eat better, exercise more, or save money? Maybe you want to get rid of debt or take a dream vacation. This is YOUR year to make it all happen! You CAN make the changes you desire and these steps show you how!

A meaningful re-start

Last New Year’s Eve, as the clock struck midnight and we watched the ball drop, my friend made a resolution. She decided to try to cut her debt in half by the end of the year. She was tired of feeling overwhelmed by bills and wanted to make a change to really improve her life moving forward.

When she made the resolution, she wasn’t sure how to make it happen. She just knew it needed to be done. She figured setting the goal was a good start, and she had to start somewhere.

She is not alone. Most people consider a new year a chance to re-boot, reconnect, or re-start different aspects of their lives. As Anita Everett, Director of the Center for Mental Health Services wrote in her article about building good mental health habits, “As we think of New Year’s resolutions, we naturally reflect on how we can better ourselves and contemplate changes to make that happen.” (1)

Why people make resolutions

The actions you take are unique to your life experience. Although others may be able to relate to the desire to eat better or the drive to exercise more, your feelings and motivations are all your own.

And yet, as Everett said, we do want to better ourselves. What motivates you is part of your own story, but some reasons why people make resolutions are relatable to just being human. Resolutions are made to:

Have control - setting a goal for greater self-efficacy.
Inspire change - transforming specific parts of your life.
Improve outlook - building hope for the future.
Increase accomplishments - advancing the quality of your life.

Some resolutions are made to right a wrong or correct a mistake. You see the new year as a chance for a fresh start. And you are absolutely correct - this year is full of possibilities!

The harsh reality

As the year progresses and you get used to writing 24 on all your work, you might find yourself slipping.

And that is okay - a lot of people do.

The harsh reality of New Year’s resolutions is that unless you go about them the right way, your chance of success is limited. According to a study on New Year’s resolutions, 55% of participants reported success (2). That means almost half of them did not reach their goals.

Another study about resolutions showed that 77% of the people in the group stuck with their goals after one week, but that number plummeted to 19% after two years (3).

Why they don’t stick

Resolutions are like glue. There is a variety of different types out there, and although some really work great, some really don’t. The successful one is the type that fits your purpose. It is the one that jives with your situation and that you can personally handle.

Some of the reasons resolutions don’t stick include:

Not enough time.
Limited resources.
No social support.
Lack of self-confidence.
No clear plan or structure.

A study on resolutions and the attempt at change found that lack of control and lack of willpower hindered success (3). When you don’t have enough control over the situation you want to improve, and you tell yourself you don’t have to try, then you aren’t setting yourself up to achieve your goals.

The direct connection between what resources you have and your mindset is crucial to embrace. Every dream needs certain material “things” to make it a reality. But your belief in yourself and having the correct mindset is more valuable than any stuff money can buy.

You may have the most expensive home gym on the market, but if you don’t think it can help you, that you aren’t strong enough, or that using it will never make a difference, then your self-defeating mindset has already sabotaged your success.

A new approach

Recognizing what hinders you is a great place to start for making lasting change. But it is just the start! There is an amazing journey awaiting you when you decide to transform your life with New Year’s resolutions, or any kind of goal-setting.

It isn’t going to be instant. And it probably isn’t going to be easy. But if you follow a new approach of combining a positive attitude (or mindset work) with an action, and repeat this sequence until it becomes a lifestyle, then you can achieve your goals.

Steps to follow for lasting change

So now you are at the heart of the matter! You WANT to make changes. You DESERVE to have the best year ever. And you know what? You WILL!

Success is within your reach!

Attitude - Name your goal. It may sound too simple, but you need to start by defining what your goal is. Let your mind really have fun thinking about what you want to achieve and how your new life would look. A healthier you looking good in a new outfit? Yes! Paying cash for a well-deserved vacation? Absolutely!
Action - Write it out. Grab a pencil, pen, or marker and draw or write down what your goal is. Design a plan that is as specific as possible, including resources, time, and any other factors that affect your success. Post it somewhere you see every day.
Attitude - Define your motivation. Now that you have decided what your goal is, you need to take an honest look at what motivates you. Is it money? Is it free time? Whatever it is, choose right now to make this a part of your life. Use the power of this source of motivation to strengthen your resolve. A study showed that people who resolved to make a change had a 42% rate of success over those who did not choose a resolution (4).
Action - Implement reward. Put a plan in place to reward yourself with what motivates you when you achieve a milestone toward your goal. Be specific, but be reasonable, too!
Attitude - Embrace the journey. Remind yourself every day why you are doing this, and give yourself grace when you fall off your path. Your failures aren’t meant to stop you but to show you what doesn’t work so you can move on to what does work.
Action - Seek support. You need people. Don’t be afraid to admit that. Your goals are much easier to achieve when you have people who love and support you cheering you on. Let a person or a group of people you trust know what you are doing and ask them to become involved or to hold you accountable while working toward your goals.
Attitude - Check-in. Just like you do with doctors, check in with yourself mentally each month to make sure you are maintaining a positive attitude. If you are not, revisit your motivation and, if needed, change your reward. Nothing is written in stone and you are free to adjust your plan as you see fit.
Action - Measure performance. Look at how you are doing at least once a month. Be specific in measuring your performance so you can celebrate progress and move forward in your goals. This also allows you to see what is not working and what you should eliminate.

This new approach of combining mindset work with actionable choices keeps your head in the right space and your feet moving forward. If you maintain a balance between a positive attitude and activities you can quantify, then your self-confidence grows and your stressors take a back seat.

The Desired Result

There is one word that can make or break these steps- consistency. You need this! If you care about setting goals and making a difference in your life, then you need to understand that consistency is the key to your transformation and realizing your desired results.

If you only pay your bills on time once out of every six months, your credit rating will not go up, and financially, you will not be in a better place. If you only ask your partner for a date night once every four months, your relationship could suffer. If you only work out once a month, you will not see the physical changes you hope for.

What are these examples missing? Consistency! Depending on what your goal is, you have to commit to be consistent enough to truly allow change to take place.

Other factors that determine how successful your results are include how much support you receive, how ready you are to make changes in your life, and how your skill sets align with your goals, according to studies.

Working with a Life Coach

The best way to get the results you want is to work with a life coach who can guide you through these steps. Whether in person, virtual, or over the phone, a life coach knows the techniques to help you reach your potential, achieve your goals, and live a more fulfilling life.

Book a free Exploration session with me today to begin your journey to a more happy, healthy, confident you!

In conclusion

New Year’s Resolutions are easy to make and sometimes even easier to break, too. But it doesn’t have to be that way. By following the steps outlined here, you can make the changes you want in your life starting today. Maybe by the next New Year’s Eve, all of your resolutions will have come true!

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